Masala Dosai and start to of a new chapter in life...

Note- Although what is below this text was written a long time ago, it was never completed or published. Hence I (abruptly) decide to post it today..finally...

A crisp golden brown crepe, bathed in a dab of sizzling butter and unabashedly enclosing the spiced starchy delight, accompanied by the irresistible aroma of Sambhar and the lure of seasoned coconut chutney........
Just another saturday evening, and when you hear the intermittent 'growl' of the reliable 'Sumeet' mixer and grinder, you know the menu for Sunday breakfast, lunch, snack and dinner! Idli and Masala Dosa followed by Idli, Utthapam and Masala dosa.
No. These are not indulgences that you pamper yourself with, if your mother has gifted culinary skills or your entire family is devoted to - "South Indian' delicacies. But these are the weekend treats which make themselves omnipresent and you omniscient when it comes to any special occasion like a birthday or anniversary.
So that is how I grow up. Though my staple diet is lots of green vegetables and lentils (does a vegetarian have more choices?- ok...the lament in the tone is a cheater), wheat chapatis (because I 'am' genetically North Indian) and Chawal or rice (because I "am" a more than half Assamese...no rice- no life! person) and fruits ( because you need to eat healthy). But I do have a regular dose of "IQ Tablets" a.k.a Idlis and another regular treat of Masala Dosai!
Change is life and I was facing exemplary proportions of it beginning a few months ago. At times I felt I was on a springboard practicing to qualify for the upcoming Olympics! As series of these wonderfully strenuous changes catapulted my life to Los Angeles.(I must begin by clarifying a few things here or I will run the risk of being mistaken as a complete headless foodie and this blog as a food blog. Well... both of the above concerns are true and this is NOT a food blog!).My life in Los Angeles begins with 'dal chawal' and takes off with Masala Dosai at Mayura restaurant on Venice boulevard. While I was still trying to figure out what was happening to meThis expression is only representative though.

To clarify further- this isn't a food blog nor is it a travelogue about the City of Angels. It is just about me and my life in Los Angeles.

I knew about a lot of people who lived here, worked here, gathered for evening Chais and paarthayy-ed during the weekends and made life fun. And then I met them.
They were all different yet almost the same - warm welcoming leg pulling teasers!

Its not my fault..that I remember to do the wrong things ;-)

Hello S Space, 

After continually depriving myself of your company and thinking of seeking solace in writing to you, I probably am doing it today. Unless of course I start talking to you (like now) and leave the conversation abruptly (maybe?) incomplete...

Nevertheless, you are my best and most trusted companion to date. DO you know why? You are my best companion because you help me and guide me when I return to you, instead of enacting a throwback at my past mistakes and rolling your eyes in a judgmental fashion. Today, I wanted to discuss with you what I just found out. I was pondering over why and how in my life I have ended up making the same mistakes over and over again. This behavior has been sometimes annoying to myself and others while it has been sometimes life altering in both good and bad ways. When I was little I was taught that when I do not know the answer to a question, I must look within, introspect and meditate to find my guiding light. I must admit that I have done this and have found reasonable answers. But this was the story of my past. Letting bygones be bygones, today my life has a plethora of problem statements, open errands, and responsibilities that are growing faster than my ability and efficiency to meet them. Therefore, when faced with a question now, I just type it into google! Google engines guide me through, remarkably fast to reasonably correct locations (usually). Brain research experts maintain that we repeat our mistakes because of how our brain functions. When we do something, we form a memory aka a neural pathway. When I do something good, my brain makes a pathway and it does the same when I make a mistake. So when I am trying hard to not repeat a mistake, I essentially slip bak into the pathway made when I has first made that mistake. It is confusing but the simpler way to telling the story is that this is the scientific way of explaining how we build habits. Old habits die hard, because they have survived longer and allowed to be repeated several times. The next question to answer is how to get out of this vicious circle then? Start afresh fearlessly. Fear is our most ferocious enemy. When I am afraid that what happened in the past will happen again, I essentially let my brain fall back into the old neural pathway and repeat the same mistake. So all I need to do is to be fearless and start aiming to fulfil my goals with a fresh new me. And help those grey cells make a new pathway for me…a pathway to succeed! 

Musings of a Journey

Musings of a Journey

This part of the campus is actually beautiful and this is good for I shall be spending coming 4 years of my life perhaps making history in the building behind me...

This was a thought on a bright August morning as I sat appreciating the dappled hues of green on the hill behind the clock tower and staring occasionally at its reflection in the pond in front of me. Albeit, it was not solitary, it came along with the wonderful stirring of the nature lover inside me and a whimpering realization that the concrete bench under me might still be wet with the morning dew. A few months ago, a professor in the Physics department at Cotton College had asked me what I envisioned to do with my future and my instantaneous reply was either of Computer or Chemical Engineering. Unsurprisingly, I had a little idea about each of the two fields and not the slightest hint that I will be standing here, yet undecided if this is the best choice for my future. But then the dreamer in me tells me: How will it be a future if you know all about it?

So this is how my life in Chemical Engineering at AEC began. Again unsurprisingly, with some dreams that were, well, not totally wingless, aspirations that seem so immature now, and for the sake of honesty, my admission that I had no real clue what I was going to do! Yet when I look back now, I smile with content that I began my journey with the enthusiasm of an optimist.

To be able to take a step back in time and relive my life at AEC was the strong motivation to do what I am doing now (writing). And having suppressed the urge to write: “Reminiscences- My life at AEC”, in the title section of this article, I think I am ready to move ahead.

It is interesting that we spent the first two semesters at AEC practically travelling through the campus, trotting from one class room to another at its other end. But the most memories are from the remaining time that was spent in our Chemical Engineering building. The early morning bus rides to campus were followed by a practically regular trip to the terrace to enjoy the view of Deepor Beel before classes for the day began. With some fun, some argument and a little mischief, some problems were solved, some exams were conquered and some awards were won as each semester rolled on. I sincerely thank all my friends and classmates because in some way or another you all have been a part of the fun and/or learning experiences that those four years brought me. Whether it was hauling the massive solar dryer for our first term project, (that I hope with utmost sincerity, my group has not forgotten), or refinery internship, performing at the Department freshers/farewell night, or running after a friend who had collected my marksheet before I even looked at it: each experience had a distinct flavor yet each memory brings the same smile to my face today.

From un-notified class quizzes to his crisp remark about how I could not get the first rank in class and to his rare appreciation that some class notes were publishable; I now realize that I subtly admire Dr. Makhan Lal Das Sir's very 'different' way of inspiring us to excel.

My favorite two memories during life at the Department are quite contrasting. First, enacting the role of Runjun mam (I was thrilled that I ‘the nerd' was chosen to play the role of the best dressed and most admired lady!) for our classic skit. And second, walking through a large hall filled with hundreds of people from different departments at Gauhati University, to collect my ‘Best Lady Graduate’ award.

There are several stories I have in my mind, some sweet and short, some sour and therefore long but now each of them tells just one story, that of life and its learning experiences. My life at Chemical Engineering, AEC taught me a lot, although it took me a while to realize it did. I also realize that we often fail to show enough appreciation for the wonderful people who come to teach us and the other wonderful human beings around us. Today, I want to express my perhaps unexpressed gratitude to each and every faculty member and all my friends and class mates. Thank you.

From Chemical Engineering at AEC, my journey that had just begun, progressed with  my Masters' at IIT Guwahati and continues with  my PhD in Chemical Engineering at University of Houston, sometimes gliding over and sometimes bumping against hurdles yet surely carrying along everything that the four years I am writing about have taught me. Life has taken different turns ever since and is on an ever extending roller coaster ride every day. Yet some things never change....

Several years ago, I was working late in the night to complete my last minute drafting of engineering drawing assignments or preparing for the exam tomorrow. Today, I put my 2 year old to bed, fall half asleep with her but then start working late in the night to write what I had promised myself and a friend to finish. And hope that it is not too late for my journey called Chemical Engineering at AEC to make it to the Souvenir that celebrates 50 years of creating many memories like and unlike mine.

Colors of Fall

What I always thought only spring could bring
I see that Fall does it too
Ebullient hues of green I had seen
The dappled shades of sun but few
I wondered what I saw from afar
Would it be closely alluring too?
A pleasant delight is all I felt
To touch and feel the sun kissed dew
The brightest clothes of the morning star
Born as Spring's enchanting gifts
I have craved with all my might ever
Shamelessly jumping down the street
No less can I love the same color
Now embellishing its leafy sibling

But just as I wish for it to stay
And let me live a gulp of peace
A flippant shake of nature's cloak
Reminds of the evanescence of things
Just as I let the amorous wind
Sing leisured tunes through my being
A ruthless gush breaks my trance
Stripping Fall adorns in a fling!

But as tearful deluge pain conspires with
Elysian joy connives too...
When nature cycles through winter,
spring buds and rainy squall
reminiscent of the feelings today
return to me the colors of Fall.

And they lived happily ever after....

This is not a love story, but it is a story.

It could be true or complete fiction but definitely not a combination. Let’s go over it, as the character herself narrates it.

Life is simple for those who want everything and those to want nothing, but it gets complicated for those who want 'some of everything'. The quest for their answers often takes them away from what the original question was. Paradoxical isn’t it? But then life is too complicated to fit into a physical formula or a chemical equation. Math is the most powerful language and usually solves most of the problems we face. However, it is but a subset of nature where we have sprung up from, and nature is beyond all. If there is something that can surpass the speed of nature then it is nature itself in the form of the human mind.

Fortunately or unfortunately, I belong to the class of ‘some of everything-s’ and my mind is a seriously wandering bloke. While it is still entangled in solving the mysteries it has created for itself, it is intrigued with an interesting question life has put forth. And the challenge is to be or not to be able to solve it!

Perhaps the worst drawback of living with your parents is that you never realize when you grew up. You never realize that it will be soon time to step out into the world which is not ideal. These were the professional potholes that I fell into when I joined my first job. I was never bullied in school. Perhaps that was because I was the best performer, most sought after and loved. Thus I was dealing with the not so ‘good’ part of the world and learning from my mistakes and experiences. But then suddenly, as I was still juggling with several concerns in my life, there popped up another one. This time, I did not have a hand free but I was sure I could not make a learning experience out of it. The problem was not of letting something else drop while I got this one. The problem was that I had to select the right ‘juggle’ and balance it right on my nose!

The hunt for an eligible groom was on and though disinterested at first, I slowly started being curious. Mails and e-mails that brought in photographs and bio-data, horoscopes and family backgrounds do not continue unnoticed for a long time. In my case, it carried on for long enough to increase my curiosity to a level that I began to worry how easily and fast they traveled from the first drawer to the bottom drawer of my father's desk! A sneak peek or at times high handed generosity enlightened me with bits of information like photos, names and educational backgrounds. It was disheartening to see some interesting ones make to the "rejected' drawer while it was a pleasure to see some others leave. So the essence of the problem is- it was a tough screening process, where family, qualification, values, vegetarianism, character (every society has a network of 'caring' men, who can delve alimentary deep) and even the Stars had a great deal to say, before I had to even bother!

The bright side of this was that I seemed destined to choose a piece of cake from the best prepared batch! I knew this was the design of overprotective and extremely possessive parents but was not sure if it was depriving me of some learning through experiencing?
The doubts were soon cleared though.

I 'unofficially' met two prospective candidates. Well, I am mostly shy to admit that I did, but then I must not lie to you. They were nice people. One sweet intelligent doctor whom I wouldn't mind recommending another friend to marry. Another, tall, aggressive, street smart manager with well... some good looks too! The important part is that all these characteristics would be obvious to even the least discerning eye. Yet I could make my decision. And then I knew, it was just instinct and not experience that it took to make a good one. And this one was just round the corner.
If you are sure that I don't sound worldly wise at all and you are as confused as I initially was, then here's the explanation. To be a good person is one thing but to be too good to live with is another. I could project myself in a total winning situation and who doesn't know that there is no fun in eating a whole cup of ice-cream with no one to fight over with? I wanted a good life but I loved my pasta with a pinch of spice! In the second case, I wanted a great fun-filled life but we defined them variously. I was sure I will get love but was equally sure that I will make efforts to give it back. Hence, the 'wise' decisions were made and as I said, the wisest one was just round the corner...

It took a day to eliminate reasons for rejecting him. All the primary questions of concern had been asked and the worst fears overcome. Now was the compatibility gauging time and we gave ourselves luxury of that. Grey matter is as much of a turn on as a character walking out of a Mills & Boon plot. And I am not modest enough to not admit that. Power to think aloud with a little courage to differ, a lot of honesty, a tinge of good humor but a great deal of sincerity is what it really took.

With acquaintance of days culminating into a relationship and more of months, it was amazing to notice that the right 'juggle' was chosen and now nicely sat on my nose!

As time closed in on us, it was a mutual realization how marriage would be the right step in the right direction.
Finally, a great wedding was happening. The stage was set with bridal finery, overjoyed family and a reception to be remembered. Rings were exchanged and so were the wedding vows and a lifetime of commitment began.

With this, through the highs and lows of life they lived happily ever after.....

And as I relate this story, I must be a 100 years old but firm enough to look back at this time with the smile on my wrinkled face completing the sparkle that begins in my eyes....

Why did we get...UNwiser..?

Our ancient history is replete with examples of organized civilizations, mighty kingdoms, massive wealth, lavish lifestyles juxtaposed with epitomes of great wisdom and discipline, philosophical thinkers and mathematicians, scientists and medics, poets and writers, architects and artisans among others. Indian history, however skewed by imperialistic motives or political influences, still boasts of the 'golden' Gupta and Maurya reigns, Takshashila and Nalanda Universities and Aryabhatta and Susruta. However, surprisingly we have failed as a nation to imbibe the wisdom that was handed down by our predecessors, let alone propagate it. We had the Vedas and the Samhritas, yet it took some caucasian whites to come over, learn about them and talk to the world. We had the 'Arthashastra', yet it took us several years before the world took recognition to an 'INDIAN' contribution to economics when Amartya Sen was awarded the Nobel in 1998. Our ancient scripts and literature were partly plundered or destroyed during the numerous invasions we were subjected to in the past and souvenirs of our illustrious heritage partly given away by the morons who took throne after the 'mighty' empires fell. The remnants lie 'secured' in museums, inaccessible. The number system and algebra were invented by the Hindus (ancient Indians) and so was the 'zero' (by Indian mathematician Aryabhatta). Yet the time lag between the passage of this information to the rest of the world was so great that the numerals 1, 2, 3...are known as Arabic numerals courtesy the Arab travelers who adopted them and popularized them. The same goes with our world acclaimed 'spices and condiments' while India woke from a slumber to fight back 'Basmati' patent rights from RiceTec. Oh...and interestingly, we unfortunate Indians also had the 'Kamasutra' which the western world now hails in documentaries sans any credit to the writer (even I don't know who wrote it!!) while we were busy in a population increment at a rate that is choking us now!!

We lost our relics, locked our history and perhaps let loose ourselves in pursuit of the West in perhaps during the British rule and post-independence period when the rest of the world moved ahead of the renaissance. We continue to lose a massive tourist revenue owing our border disputes up north or our internal conflicts and self-inflicted dispute situations far east. And we continue ravaging our natural resources and national heritage sites, not to mention those that could have been but were lost due to our 'secular-non-secular' wars. We have the wildlife protection bills, yet the poachers walk out with pachyderm tusks and rhino horns. When China rants claims over parts of our beautiful Arunachal, creates all the brouhaha about the Dalai Lama visit, and denies visa to Indians from the state, we care to focus on what Shashi Tharoor 'Tweets'. 

It makes me wonder....was it some unnatural exchange of genes that made us Unwiser...? ;-)